I like most people use public transport to get to work, now me I’m waiting for a train to leave because I had to use cash to top up my oyster blah blah blah. I’m a bit high, listening to Ram Dass and drinking an energy drink even though I already had coffee before I left.
So I’m sitting here 09.28am on a Sunday morning going to Poundland in Peckham where I now work. Though I can’t really call it work, I have little to know clue what to do as I didn’t receive any training to do said job but hey, I won’t be there for that long, hopefully.

I’m due to get paid tomorrow from my previous job and then the few days at poundland, I don’t think I’m even going to get paid to be honest but we will see this time tomorrow morning, if I’m not then I’m not going in and it’s that simple, so again I pretty much don’t have a job. Do I go back to a gym? Do I pursue teaching (it will be very long)? Social media stuff ( don’t have it ). Learn a new skill? Don’t know about that because of time.

How do I feel? Tired, shit, fed up, annoyed, you get the picture.
My life is falling apart due to my own mistakes and foolishness. Not blaming anyone but I’ve accepted my failings and will unravel everything and start from fresh, I have goals I just need to find my way of accessing or have a platform to begin to build upon it.

With all things that are crumbling in my hands, picking up the pace in the race of life you start small, giving thanks for each new day, taking my vitamins at the same time each day, small steps before taking the big ones. Then I will have more routines as time goes by that will allow me to be calm and ready for anything that is pushed my way.
I am not obligated to put myself in a position that can alter my being for someone or thing and to own my choices, which are for me.
I need to always remember that because I often forget. I will endure certain things for a moment for someone.

At the end of the day, I just want to be very clear and honest with those I come into conversation or contact with however, I truly want to be left to do my thing which is sort out my life because I know I can be doing a lot better with everything. Money management, work, health and fitness, appearance, confidence, love life, career amongst other things.
My current capacity doesn’t allow me to focus on anything else apart from those things.